Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
