Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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