Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
