Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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