around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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