i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
BRING THE BAGELS
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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