Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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