hotel room ftw
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
