everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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