I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize