return my video game
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize