woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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