Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
