i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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