im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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