WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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