last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
