This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
