I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
