Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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