Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
