brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize