So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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