It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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