After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize