Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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