fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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