it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
