Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night

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(517): View more from Michigan

My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

i got excepted to unl lol

(402): View more from Nebraska

You mean "accepted".

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(208): View more from Idaho

just looked at his mug shot... not really my type

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(740): View more from Ohio

While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.

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(518): View more from New York

Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.

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(240): View more from Maryland

When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th

(1-240): View more from Maryland

133 to go

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(530): View more from California

can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe

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