I hate all girls vehemently.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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