He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Just pee around me
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
