Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize