When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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