I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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