Can i not drive my cunt home
I CAN MOONWALK!
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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