I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
