We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
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