Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
