so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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