His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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