She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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