she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
well I can't set my house on fire every night
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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