I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
