Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
