Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?

(410): View more from Maryland

Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women

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(904): View more from Florida

Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job

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(770): View more from Georgia

Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

yo everyone went to the hospital last night

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(646): View more from New York

Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?

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(347): View more from New York

THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.

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(253): View more from Washington

I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first

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