your thong is hanging out like whoa
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
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