I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
