its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
BRING THE BAGELS
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
