dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
