What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Randomize
